Thursday, August 17, 2006

Elimination Episode 7

BawkBawk refers to SuavePorn as musical masterminds?!? Hardly.
Bilgy ~ nice jeans, my friend. Snug in ALL the right places.

Recap: Oh, poor Storm. Everyone’s picking on her. Suck it up, Princess. She didn’t get anywhere near the negativity that Jill endured every week she was on the show.

An Announcement by Bilgy: SP is going to get up off their asses & play each elimination episode. An original SP song with one of the rawkers taking lead vocals so they can assess the “chemistry” with each of them.
After saying no less than 6 times that no decision has been made, no one is ahead of anyone else, and more blah, blah, BLAH which they re-iterated so many times that you just KNOW they mean the opposite, SP announced that Dilana would be singing with them.

Dilana sings “Leave the Lights On” {this is what I’m calling it anyway) with SP. I think she stole Patrice’s hair from last week, or at least the rat that creates this nest. Oh wow, 4 sleazy backup dancers are joining her on stage, dressed very similar to her. Yes, I’m sure that no-one knew Dilana would be chosen, a sooper-seekrit to all. Ha!

Did T.Lee just say the dancers “are dope” or “are on dope”?
BawkBawk announces that Sept. 13 is the finale with 4 finalists. That ends THAT discussion. And ensures there will be no more double elims.

Encore: Ryan ~ again in his Unabomber clothing line. The string quartet is back, but shunted to the side. Puffy Kracker, who is abstaining from the crack that is Rockstar, said from the computer room “That was OK”. High praise indeed, boys & girls.

Bottom3: Zayra, Patrice & Magni. Only 1 right again. Man, didn’t see Magni coming at all!

Zayra ~ Razorblade by Blue October. When I first saw her outfit, I thought “Flasher”. Nice trench coat & thigh-high boots, and then… an ass-flash. So I was right. Seriously, don’t know the song, but WTF was that?
Patrice ~ Celebrity Skin by Hole. And she leaves the stage and rounds the corner & up and over he rawkers pod, and she’s down into the audience and coming around the home stretch and OMG she’s up in the couch area & singing right in their faces. Whew! That was quite the horse race. She is so bland now! What happened? She’s lost her spark. And again with the flippin’ Buddha Bow. Meh.
Magni ~ Creep by Radiohead. He starts out the song wearing an Aunt Agnes hat. Not nice. Not his best … Ooops! Spoke too soon, he just hit the “Run, Run” and it was awesome.

My guess during the commercial break is Zayra will finally be put out of her misery {and ours}& released from the gilded cage.

Bilgy does his usual run-through all the Bottom3, saying to Magni “You’re not going anywhere, sit your ass down”.
You know, if I may digress for a moment, there’s only one word that aptly describes SP and that is “Class”. You heard me, this is one class act.

So the Hatchetman tells Patrice “We believe you have potential for SP” so Zayra, “Unfortunately, you have to go”. The nicest axing yet.
Zayra babbles something about all they’ve learned and yadda, yadda, Jason collapses in a sobbing heap on the couch (tantrum, really, very sad at his age) and it’s all over for another week.

Now, if we just lose Patrice & Toby, then we’ll be down to the nitty gritty.

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